A Guide to the Naive World of Old Alien Pics

THE DYING ALIEN

Origin: unknown, but probably nefarious; mid-2000s

The best thing about this alien picture is that it shows that somebody somewhere was trying to keep this alien alive. That gives us hope that not everyone that comes in contact with a real alien is looking to exploit them for negative reasons. This picture of a dying alien shows the alien in a seriously frail state but fighting to stay alive. We only wish we knew if the alien in this alien picture won its fight for life.

Naive hopes and musings about how Some People Are Nice To Aliens aside, the truth of this image is simple: it’s a promo picture from The X-Files, specifically “Musings of a Cigarette Smoking Man”:

While the coloring is different due to the way it’s shot, the medical equipment and the shape of the alien’s nose and eyes match up perfectly, making it certain this is

The source of the promo picture is unknown, but Kentaro Mori says it came to the internet via a long-gone X-Files fansite.

Really, I posted this for the tone of the site’s prose: the odd, naive, hopeful enthusiasm you find in one strain of Ye Olde UFO Culture. Alien-UFO-Pictures dot com embraces everything with a smiling face and a little hope.

An obvious art piece, created in 1978 before proliferating across UFO books in the 90s and landing on this site long after their creator, Linda Corriveau, stepped forward? Sure. Also, they save it as “Chinese looking alien” which, problematic?

A photo of perfectly normal hieroglyphics with the suggestion ancient Pharaohs wore big hats to cover their big alien heads? Why not!

We are told in schools that the great pyramid of Egypt took 40 years to build and it’s purpose was to bury a pharoah. Come on now, are we that gullible and were the Egyptians that gullible? Of course not, who would spend 40 years of hard labor building a pyramid just to stuff a dead body in it after 40 years of hard work. That hardly sounds logical for such an obviously advanced culture as the Ancient Egyptians. They invented their own language for god sakes, are we to think they were dumb enough to spend 40 years sweating their guts out for only burying 1 body.

Sure, we have many burial sites, engravings, and even books detailing Egyptian death beliefs at length…but isn’t it a bit weird for a society to put so much effort into one person’s grave? Egyptology, debunked (???)

(Side bar: I always love when New Age types talk about how it “can’t be a coincidence” that pyramids exist so many places…even though Mesoamerican pyramids look nothing like Egyptian pyramids, and that they served different functions. Almost like it’s a logical shape for building large structures in bits, or something.)

Like the people from Easter Island who were called the Birdmen Tribe, he too can fly.

Sure! Easter Islanders could fly. Why not!

One image on this site of a “dead alien” is, according to IsaacKoi, a photo of a real dead person, photoshopped to have an alien’s face, since people are awful.

I always love claims of UFOs appearing in paintings because it implies a UFO just flew by while they were painting & they chose to include it, like they just asked the weird pointy alien spaceship to stand still a bit so they could get its lines, since of course it’s impossible for historic artists to be symbolic or use stylization.

Here are 2 pictures of the movie Alien Vs Predator, I found it worthwhile to add them to this alien picture page because so many people search for Alien Vs Predator pictures online.

Serious UFOlogy, everyone!

An alien under arrest, presented without any comment, that originally featured in the sterling pages of the Weekly World News? Why not.


FARM ALIENS

Origin: ???

By comparison to the others, these photos are relatively mysterious. Spreading since at least 2004, these photos are alleged to come from Italy, Mexico, and most commonly England, where one site dates them more specifically to the South of England, November 1999. Further searching reveals a source (thanks to this gloriously Geocities-y webpage), Insidor.com, now long-gone.

Insidor.com claimed the images were from a video, and includes the following story:

Mr XXXX was woken in the night by the sound of a neighbour’s dog whining, and a strange feeling. He ventured outside and saw a strange light in the sky. He describes the light as being in three parts, triangular with the brightest point of light in the front. Mr XXXX went back inside grabbed his video camera, and filmed for 4 minutes. He describes hearing a muffled noise near the end of his garden and approached and filmed what he called ‘strange little ghost’. Mr XXXX claimed to have had strange experience throughout his life and an interest in the Paranormal.

Okay?

The site does have a video section; oddly, it only includes well-known UFO videos like Gulf Breeze, White Sands, and 70s UK TV hoax Alternative 3 and not the video of the literal aliens the site claims they were sent. Strange!

But information isn’t forthcoming, so I’d imagine this was some kind of art project or proto-ARG, given the site’s backstory about “Aquarius”. Still, I love these images because they are all incredibly powerful moods:

Like, same?


CHILEAN PARK ALIEN

Origin: …a Chilean park.

We return to Kentaro Mori for a debunking of this little fella.

I think when I first saw this photo it was identified as being in Moscow; Japanese investigators dubbed it a kappa (…walking over land in Chile?); however, it is definitely from Santiago’s Parque Forestal.

I’ve always loved this one. I love an alien picture that’s just a tiny little guy walking between some horse cops for no reason, and the blurriness of every single thing in frame. Like, genuinely.

But if it isn’t an alien, alternative theories dubbed it possibly: an imp; a ghost; a tree branch; a child or a monkey. Or a hoax.

However, analysis showed it wasn’t a hoax, but mistaken identity: it’s likely a dog, snapped in the middle of an awkward pose, with the “arms” being its hind legs. A weird dog, but a good dog.

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The Week in Conspiracy Theories: Top Minds Explore The Satanic Origins of Feminism, Islamophobia Down Under and More!

Feminism: A Secret Freemason Plot?

Via r/conspiratard comes this jumble of run-on sentences alleging that Feminism is a Rockefeller/Rothschild/Satanist/Freemason conspiracy to make sure the state raises children, not parents.

56561954Feminism is a cruel hoax, telling women their natural biological instincts are “socially constructed” to oppress them. It is elite social engineering designed to poison male-female relations – divide and conquer. By promoting Feminism, the state is able to gain the allegiance of women to promote more government control. Their twin objectives are depopulation and totalitarian world government. Research it so you can believe your own eyes. IT’S A TRAP! IT’S A SET UP!

 

To be a Freemason, in most lodges you have to be two things:

  1. A man
  2. Religious (usually Christian)

But let’s not dwell on those facts. Let’s instead dwell on this site’s bizarre images:

fem 3

Women! They have eyes! The All-Seeing Eye. Money. Government. Women making a hand symbol! Three of them! Looks like three sixes. ARE WOMEN A FREEMASON-ILLUMINATI-SATANIST PLOT!??? Of course! IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW! Continue reading