The Week in Conspiracy Theories: Top Minds Explore The Satanic Origins of Feminism, Islamophobia Down Under and More!

Feminism: A Secret Freemason Plot?

Via r/conspiratard comes this jumble of run-on sentences alleging that Feminism is a Rockefeller/Rothschild/Satanist/Freemason conspiracy to make sure the state raises children, not parents.

56561954Feminism is a cruel hoax, telling women their natural biological instincts are “socially constructed” to oppress them. It is elite social engineering designed to poison male-female relations – divide and conquer. By promoting Feminism, the state is able to gain the allegiance of women to promote more government control. Their twin objectives are depopulation and totalitarian world government. Research it so you can believe your own eyes. IT’S A TRAP! IT’S A SET UP!


To be a Freemason, in most lodges you have to be two things:

  1. A man
  2. Religious (usually Christian)

But let’s not dwell on those facts. Let’s instead dwell on this site’s bizarre images:

fem 3

Women! They have eyes! The All-Seeing Eye. Money. Government. Women making a hand symbol! Three of them! Looks like three sixes. ARE WOMEN A FREEMASON-ILLUMINATI-SATANIST PLOT!??? Of course! IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW! Continue reading

“Al Roker Mind Control Trance “Live” Trigger Word = Holy Ghost?”

Just another day on the Today Show. Matt Lauer and Savannah Guthrie are discussing personal space. Then she says that it’s like in Catholic school: you have to leave room for the Holy Ghost.

But wait. Look at Al Roker. Why is he staring at us? Why? Please stop Al, you’re scaring the children. Al why. AL.

Some might write it off. Maybe it was a wry “haha, look at these clowns” glare gone terribly awry. Maybe someone was telling him what to say next. Maybe he had nothing to do and was just staring at the camera for…some…reason?

But the conspiracy theorist who uploaded this video knows better. He knows that Al Roker is under mind control and the “Holy Ghost” is his trigger word. Which must make church difficult. “In the name of the Father, the Son and…someone wake up Al again! Oh god stop staring at me, no wait…”

The recommended videos at the end are a door down the rabbit hole into the world of MK Ultra. See, some people believe that all celebrities are brainwashed by…someone. THEM, presumably. And every time a celebrity has a breakdown, it isn’t mental illness. No, it’s just their brainwashing breaking down!

As always, this theory tries to write off any bad things ever happening. Non-famous people may have mental problems, but when a star goes off the rails they’re just heroically fighting off the mind control they’ve suffered through since childhood.

And no, Al Roker never explained what happened here. But I can say that he probably wasn’t brainwashed by the government into…being a weatherman, until someone mentions a key figure in the country’s dominant religion, in which case he’ll publicly break down? What?